batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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