i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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