Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
