Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
