I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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