You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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