Well douche your snatch and let's go!
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
