Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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