We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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