she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major