You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
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