i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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