she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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