I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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