Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
