return my video game
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
