I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
