Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
