Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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