She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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