Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
