So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize
