dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I will pee on everything he values.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
