I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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