i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
