Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
