and you said cock pushups were impossible
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
