check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
it's like iHOP with fire
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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