Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
