I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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