elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
