he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
