I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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