This girl is more easily done than said...
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
