i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm too high and old for this...
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