16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
