Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
