Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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