hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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