I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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