I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
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Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
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Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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