So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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