If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
