you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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