I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
