I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
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