Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
