I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize