u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
