Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
He passed out mid-signature
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
