what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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